Guys, pretty much the only reason I write is because it’s like free therapy. And for the cash and prostitutes (obvs).
I just lie back in my IKEA sofa and bang out pained sentences about how I feel like I’m an intruder in someone else’s dream (any minute now you’ll all realise and attack – inception-style). Or how (as an actual adult human being) I wet myself while using an ATM (try and explain what THAT means, Doc).
And just like real therapists, sometimes you listen. Sometimes you share a little bit of your crazy, which makes me feel better (safety in numbers). Sometimes you just call me a “cunt” (because you’re a really unprofessional therapist who doesn’t get irony). And before you write letters, I’m totally allowed to say that word because it’s a quote. That’s the rule, people.
So maybe you’re a little bit cray-cray too. And maybe, like me, you’re broker than the U.S. Government (Works. On. At. Least. Two. Levels).
I’m going to climb out on an large and spiky branch here and suggest that you’d love to get up and around some free therapy. But the hitch is that you’re way too smart (read: prudish) to publish your numerous neuroses all over the Internet (yay for you and your future job prospects).
But before you call the fire brigade to rescue me from this spruce, I have an option for all you strange people who possess some form of TMI filter, but are still interested in free therapy:
It’s a website. And it’s appropriately titled, 750words.com. ‘Appropriate’ because the purpose is to write 750 words every day. 750 unfiltered, free-flowing words.
It’s not like a blog because no one else will see it. Go ahead and write about all the insanely annoying things your best friend does that makes you want to smash her whiney little face into oncoming traffic – she’ll never see it. (Note: Even if you do have a blog, 750words is a great way to unearth embarrassing new stories to feed the raving hoards. How else do you think I unrepressed that ATM story?)
It’s more like your personal diary – a private place to work through your thoughts. But it’s online, so there’s no way your Mum can accidentally binge-read it while ‘sweeping’ under your bed (but if you’re still living with your parents you might need more than 750 words a day – just sayin’).
Here’s the rubdown:
Write 750 words every morning. Just let ‘em flow in all their uncensored, grammatically incorrect glory. No one will see it, so no need to worry. The process of brain dumping is cleansing. And it can bring to the surface thoughts and concerns you didn’t even know you had. All the better to deal with.
It’s that easy.
Over time, your brain will feel clearer. Fresher. Just like you’ve worked through all your issues with an actual therapist. Only you won’t have to sell your dirty underwear to afford the privilege.
If you like free therapy via 750words.com, send your cash and/or prostitutes to email@example.com. Or if you’d rather, leave a comment and tell me how you tame your crazy.